


Teach Me

by akatsuki_tsukiyomi (Yumi25Nakashima)



Series: First Blush [37]
Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt, Emotionally Repressed, Established Relationship, F/M, Hetalia Countries Using Human Names, Reader-Insert, Songfic, Unhealthy Relationships, Unresolved Emotional Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-04
Updated: 2021-01-04
Packaged: 2021-03-14 16:08:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,284
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28548384
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yumi25Nakashima/pseuds/akatsuki_tsukiyomi
Summary: "I love you," she said as if to remind him.He hummed and pressed his lips against hers. Soft and sweet.
Relationships: Iceland (Hetalia)/Reader
Series: First Blush [37]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2089500
Kudos: 4





	Teach Me

**Author's Note:**

> (F/N) - Reader's First Name  
> (L/N) - Reader's Last Name  
> Emil Steilsson - Iceland's official human name
> 
> The song featured in this one-shot is Keaton Henson's 'Teach Me.'

_Teach me how to love you like I wrote_

He looked at her, braiding her hair in front of the vanity. She caught his eye in the mirror and she smiled. He mirrored her expression. Once her eyes were back on her hair, his face fell neutral. He looked out the bedroom window. It was a beautiful day.

_And say it like I mean it when I don't_

He made his way towards the bookshelf on the far wall of the spacious bedroom. They had planned to spend the day in the garden, him reading a book and her embroidering one of his many white dress shirts.

As she pulled open a drawer of the vanity table to gather the materials for her embroidery, he pulled _Woman at 1,000 Degrees_ from the shelf. His bookmark stuck out from the top of the book. He was barely halfway through.

_Teach me how to hold you in my arms_

"Let's go?" She asked, holding out her hand. His gloved hand found hers and he brought his lips to her knuckles, an affectionate gesture she always loved. He wondered if she could see the passiveness he projected in his eyes.

"Let's go," he affirmed before following her out the door.

_Without squeezing too damn tight and causing harm_

She seemed to love every part of him, every part he had mustered up the courage to show her. His childishness, his stubbornness, his redundant complaints of the smallest things, his meekness, his assertiveness—all of these, she seemed to accept. She welcomed him into her arms with a smile, reassuring and gentle. She embraced him with a tenderness that was foreign to him.

_I'll learn not to look at you with scorn_

How their relationship started is not central to the story. They were two people, strangers, who happened to meet and fall in love. Since then, close to a year has passed. Since then, she continued holding him as he felt himself crack under self-doubt and self-scrutiny. Since then, he had been wondering if he was in love with her or if he was merely attracted to her; to the thought of her. A seemingly faultless individual. One who could do no wrong. One who could see the beauty in all.

_If you promise to never have been born_

He wondered if he was merely attracted to the thought of having someone give him their full trust. He wondered if he had merely been attached to the peculiar bond that forms between people when they allow themselves to be vulnerable to one another. He wondered if, after all those years of struggling with himself, all by himself, he wondered if he was merely projecting his fantasies of the perfect person onto his partner.

Was she as perfect as she seemed? Was it his mind deceiving him, warping her under the ideals he had fabricated?

_By all means give me lessons in my ways_

They sat on the reclined lawn chairs, one placed beside the other, with a small table in between topped with a tray containing a pitcher of juice and two glasses. A large umbrella stood behind the table, shading them comfortably under the sun.

He opened his book and started reading, his eyes ghosting over the words, his mind absent to comprehend their meaning.

_But damn it don't expect me to change_

\---

She gently ran a brush through her hair as she stood in front of the expansive bathroom mirror. She was in her nightgown, all ready for bed. She set the brush down onto the marble counter and pushed her hair off her shoulders. Her groomed locks fell in place.

She noticed the greyness of her complexion as she brought a hand up to her cheek, gently running the pads of her fingertips over her skin. Her hand travelled from her face down to the nook where her neck and shoulder met. A purple bruise lay quietly on her, a reminder of the dominating habit he liked to blemish her with.

_Mould me to the man I should be_

He seemed to be the perfect lover at first glance, but he was a clueless child. He was filled with daydreams and fanciful notions. He was shaped by the wishful thinking he grasped from books. He was nowhere near perfect. He was rough around the edges, seemingly flawless, but not without some faults. He revered her to the point of borderline idolatry. She was his muse, the paradigm of his dreams in the form of a loving companion.

Her love for him was not to be questioned. Her affections were real. She loved the man who had a childlike heart, the man who always looked calm and composed and who never failed to be easily embarrassed. She loved him.

_But don't consider that man to be free_

But sometimes, his eyes spoke volumes in a language she did not understand. She could not understand the indifference, the detachment. No matter the warmth she felt in his arms, no matter the heat he ignited between their bodies, she felt a dispassionateness in him. He always seemed to be looking for something in her as his hold tensed, yearning to grasp her essence in his hands. His kisses were ravenous, craving to encapture her being into himself. His apathy brought about a chaotic callousness from within him. He longed to have her, even as she willingly surrendered herself to him.

_How am I expected to behave?_

She did not understand the urgency in his actions and the disinterest in his countenance. He wanted her even when she was already his yet he was impassive at the same time.

She walked out of the bathroom and turned off the lights behind her.

As she entered the dimly lit bedroom, she found him reading on the bed, already in his pyjamas. He looked up at her as she made her way to him. He smiled and she wondered if he meant it.

"Hey, you."

"Hey, you," he echoed, tucking his bookmark in between the pages and shutting his book. His eyes did not leave hers as he set it down on the table beside the bed.

_When I'm alone with myself everyday_

She got underneath the covers and nestled herself in his arms. He reached away momentarily to turn off the lamp.

As his arm returned to rest around her, he pulled her even closer, burying his face into her hair. He took in her scent as though he had never once come across her fragrance.

"I love you," she said as if to remind him.

_And I'll never love you enough my love_

He hummed and pressed his lips against hers. Soft and sweet.

" _É_ _g elska þig ástin mín_ ," **I love you my darling** he mumbled, his traitorous eyes closing. She settled for his words. As much as he did not want to let go of her and the charade he was putting up, she did not want to let go of him.

_And I'll never hold you close enough_

She laid her head on his chest, listening to the steady thumping of his heart. His hands ran through her hair, lulling her wordlessly to sleep.

_Teach me how to love you like I wrote_

Maybe tomorrow, they would find a way to understand each other. Maybe tomorrow, his words would hold more meaning. Maybe tomorrow, she would be able to get her affection across to him. Past his walls, past his defences, past his instability.

_And say it like I mean it when I don't_

Tonight, she settled for his words as he settled for her silence. Tonight, their disoriented hearts settled for artless ignorance.

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally published in Wattpad on Jul 12, 2020.


End file.
